zaaNisTa from witHiN

i luv ma homies

2005-11-22T18:53:00.000+08:00

we had an impromtu gathering at my house today...for the first time in a very long time. trust me. when i say long, i really, really times a godzillion times mean long.

it all started with the NYAA diary thingy that we're suppose to fill up and hand in 2mr to get our NYAA Bronze. I tell you, if it weren't for the award, i wouldn't even bother to pick up my pen again.hehs. Anyway, i called deebz yesterday nite and talked to her 'bout' some stuff and we ended up talking about the NYAA. i told her i can't really do it on my own, so why not she and hid come over to my crib in the mrng or smth and work it out together.

so yeps. at 1040++am there were at my place. and then deebz called j and told her they're at my crib so she decided to join us. then jee called me, asking me abt the NYAA stuff as well. so i told him we're here n by 12.50 he's here too. But...j still haven't come tho she just lives a few blocks away whereas jee lives at bb...haha...

neways, we were onto it, at least until my mom left for the hosp with my bro and erm...haha..that's when i decided to do erm..some kinda experiment on...ME..yeps..im not gonna tell ya what it is tho' haha...neways, it got the whole grp excited.
i mean REALLY EXCITED!!!it was the first time that they experienced smth like that. DONT GET THE WRONG IDEA YOU PERVERTS!! i wasn't doing porn or anything associated with it. haha.

so yeahs.we went 'astray' for a few moments.then when im done with my experiment, nobody was in the mood to sit down, take their pens out and write a diary so we kinda had a picnic AT MY HOUSE, as weird as it sounds!!

watched two movies, courtesy of j..thks babe! and j and i went to fajar to buy some light snacks...for them to chew on, no doubt. we watched 50 first dates and honey. my GAWD!!! the first movie was soooo touching...deebz cried! tho she laughed out the loudest, (excluding me) when it came to the raunchy jokes. heehee...

i owe u deebz, n hid for my erm "experiment"...haha...n j for the bubble tea n jeejee for the long awaited devdas vcd.

i love ma homies...mmmuaaacckss to you guys!i mean, girls

alertitu

2005-05-02T11:15:00.000+08:00

i have a damn dead blog

muahahahahahaha....

erm...knock knock..anybody home???

Swimming...Watching...

2005-04-16T11:56:00.000+08:00

wowee...i was very tired...NPCC unit went swimming at the CCK Stadium yesterday!!!
i had tremendous fun with deedee and nana....hahakz...love you girls!!! and also the rest of the girls from our unit...we were having our own girl talk at the spa pool and the boys were at the otehr corner..suddenly this wei hong popped out of the pool...caused us three girls to scream..and the boys and other girls laughing...hahakz...i managaed to tease raj..boy, now he would be so conscious of his underwear when he's swimming!!! wakakaka...i feel so mean..but i like....hahakz...

i'll be watching a play later, with the drama club. i think it's titled between the devil and the deep blue sea...In the film reviews in the straits times, both reviewers gave it five out of five stars...one was local and another one was a foreigner....even ying wen said its the best show she have watched in a long time..obviusly, i'm v excited...heehee...

aftermath

2005-04-14T23:45:00.000+08:00

guess what? Drama SYF is over!!!!

all the four months of rehearsal brought solid power to the 20min performance we did last wednesday at hwa chong jc. It was so nerve-wrecking when i had to wait for my turn backstage. I think all those who were invloved in theatre/stage performances know that no matter how many rehearsals you have, when it comes to the real thing, things may go wrong when you least expect them to.

That's what happened on the real day.

See, my school made use of UV light as one of our props so that the florouscent (pardon my spelling) puppets can shine in the ambience of the theatre when all the lights are off. Guess what? During our 5-min prep time, the UV could not light up!!!! The SM ( stage manager ) panicked...so did ying wen, our sch instructor...luckily at the 6th min, the light started to light up.

My heart did flip-flops when at the fifth mintute, Ying wen asked us to do without the light. I was like....gosh..there'd be no effect!!! but alhamdulillah....the light managed to outdo itself. H/ever, since we overshot our prep time by 1 min, we had to clear off the stage by 4 mins..which is not really an issue...

after that, everything went smoothly...and boy, was i immensely relieved once everything is over...phew....we have high chances of getting a SILVER award...but we'll only know our results in May...cause for drama, the judges wish to witness every performance first, then i guess have some moderation on the whole...but really, at the end of the day, the final award our instructor awarded us was GOLD for our effort, and that's what matters to me, to know that your hard work have been acknowledged.

aiyo....what happened?

2005-04-12T01:13:00.000+08:00

hey guys...guess why i'm up at such unearthly hours?

hahakz..i just completed my hmk...ooops...i mean partially completed my hmk...
i'm left with the summary of my nov 1994 compre paper..which my class ahd already done last year...don't know why prema asked us to do it again this year...and 3/9's copies are still with her hahakz...no ownder she didnt mind us doing it again coz we can't refer mah....hahakz...

i finished her 9 pg oral conversation thingy - 3pages without leaving a line for each pictures and i had 3 pictures to do...took up like most of my time...but really, during the oral time, just how much can we say? so i think writing three pages per picture does not really help because sometimes, you haven't even come to describe the significant part yet but the examiner cut you off.....irritating right?

hahakz..guess what? today...all the homwork i did over the weekend are all at home...i forgot to bring...luckily prema didnt come today - i forgot her oral file plus CME assignment...forgot to bring that is...then miss chow v sorry lehs but i left it in my chem file at home..i got do hor...heehee...

k lar me wanna do my summary then maybe wake up at 5.30 to jog for awhile so i'll be fresh throughout the day....preventing the sleepy disease!!!! heehee...c u guys around...

love you...muacks

i want you guys to know i love you all!

2005-04-10T11:20:00.000+08:00

hey...i know i know i have not updated in a looong tyme...like a week maybe? So pardon me for the long entry as lotsa stuff happened in the course of the week...

First and foremost, i just wanna say a huge THANK YOU to everybody who made my birthday worth remembering. so paiseh man, my beloved class sung the birthday song and then my prefects sang another one during debrief....hahakz...thanks so much for your lovely presents guys...and of course for your well-wishes. I really x588955 appreciate it.

I went to my aunt's place yesterday for kenduri arwah my cousin. He was the same age as me. Its been a year. He's no longer with us. I miss him. He was very close to me. We would always talk abt anything and everything under the sky. I looked at his picture yesterday. I missed that exuberant smile he always showcased, his loving-ness and all.

This week haven't been a great week for me... except for the few occasions like my birthday, bumping into SEHA on thursday and knowing a great guy. hey babe! seeing you that day brightened up my day. Rinduuuu, rindu serindu rindunyaaaa.....ohhhhhhh....hahakz....

last wednesday and friday, i didnt go for my np training cos this week is the last week for syf rehearsal. The whole cast was scolded on wednesday afternoon. From the boat crew, waves group, puppeteers all the way to the backstage crew. I teared. I teared not because i cant stand scoldings but I teared because i realised that the teachers and instructors put in a lot of effort and pinned high hopes on us so that at the end of the day, we will benefit. But all of us, in one way or another contributed to the lousy theatre rehearsal at hwa jong jc on sunday. I could sense the disappointment in all the teachers. That was what made me cry.

I realised most of the seniors, and my juniors who were really passionate about drama teared. Those who contributed the most to the mistakes were mostly my juniors who don't even give a fuck that they had let down our teachers. They could still joke around and smile after seeing the atrocious mistakes they made.

In my opinion, these are the people who joined drama because no other CCA would take them. They've got no passion for what they do. Fuck lah. If i didn't have passion for drama, i would have simply not attend rehearsals, especially on fridays where i'll go for np training in the afternoon and drama training in the evening. Sometimes i ask myself, why bother tiring myself? the answer is because i have deep-rooted passion for drama since primary school but didnt take drama as my first cca only because my mother disliked the long rehearsal hours but after awhile, i was like yearning for the stage more and more. That's why i joined drama again, even though it can only be my 2nd CCA.

But still, even though DRAMA is like my 2nd CCA, it didn't give me an excuse to give slip-shot work. or not attending drama whole-heartedly. Yet, those people whose first CCA is drama can still give slipshot work. What the fuck.

see i pee?

2005-04-02T22:21:00.000+08:00

hey...u guys didnt cross your fingers for me...boohoo.... hhakz...guess what? i was late! muahahahaha

neways...kedebak-kedebuk...aft registering and eating and choosing our own location, we proceeded to yishun. only me, nana and dee used home clothes hahakz...the rest use sch-u or half-u. heh. we break record seh. even bdk2 sec 5 dgr ckp cikgu pakai sch u...kiter yg bdk2 sec 4 nie jugak yg kepale batu nak pakai baju umah.

we reached yishun around 1100++..and by 1230, i finished all my stickers liao!!!! hahakz...got this bunch of bpians who were there earlier than me couldnt finish theirs! and we cip-ians became friends...but lupe nak mintak contact no....the sec 3 guys were v frenly...hahakz...then i helped nana with one roll of stickers and deedee another one roll....so total i did 6 rolls of stickers!!! i was so damn proud of myself....hee2...i knew i didnt waste my time doing cip yet not getting a satisfying 'collection'....know what i mean? hahakz...i'd rather do it properly and feel good about it afterwards. ceywaaaah

and i have more good news! my dearest brother nye sch team is the CHAMPION for the ongoing GPA. kudos dearest brother and also to all those involved in the GPA; be it technical, organisers, actors, extras, whatever lah...i remembered hearing that all of us need teamwork.it's like a jigsaw. if i piece is missing, the whole picture will be destroyed.heehee...and it's true. i think many people can vouch for that.

heehee...know what i realised? my two tyounger brothers each have one side of me...the older one is into malay culture - silat and puisi, and also air rifle,.......the younger one is a sch team player for badminton..and guess what? he plays better than me now! if only my "talent" was maximised when i was younger and not forced to join the drama society back then...hahakz...no lar...i didnt regret being transferred to drama as it was then that my interest was stirred up till now.

i thought 2mr can sleep into the afternoon but boy, i was sooo wrong (hint-usher's caught up) and have to report at 0700hrs outside the sch to go to hwa chong jc and have our theatre rehearsal. haiz.....i just realised we only have 3 more rehearsals before our competition. then it'll be two down, 1 more comp to go. i already missed the 'sajak days'. and soon, i'll be missing the 'syf' days. and sooon, i'll be missing my 'sec 4 days'. Damn..i can't wait for that to happen! hahakz....

winners and losers

2005-04-01T23:44:00.000+08:00

hey guys...i've been getting more lazy and lazy to update hahakz
there's simply so many things going on that i can't decide which to tell you guys about
hahakz and also time limited ar....

haiyo

today...napfa test 5 stns for me during PE lessons

standing broad jump - 188 <5pts>
shuttle run - 11.16 <5pts>
sit-ups - 33 <5>
incline pull up - 11 <4>
sit & reach N.A.

hahakz.... havent do yet....and guess what? this is my weakest station! i hope i can get >36 and get my gold...provided my 2.4 is <15mins lah...heehee....

then right after PE lessons we had a maths test...cam sial kan...hahakz....

the rest of the curriculumn time went ok lar....

after sch went to BPGH for NPCC inter-unit badminton comp.
guess what? our sch unit qualified for semi-finals but sadly, we lost three matches namely the boys single, boys doubles and mixed doubles but i knew everyone put in their best effort,

as for me, i won both matches for girls' singles hee2...not bad for a person who last touched the racquet abt 3 months ago? hahakz....

then around 1800 rushed back to schoooooool for drama syf rehearsal....i had to change super quickly to my costume and then perform for the other various syf participant frm choir, dance...ect.etc..then by the time i reached home i was so damn tired!

ingatkan bsk nak bgn lambat but got cip!!!! must report at 8am...at cck...but mtg nana and deedee at 7.50....lets cross our fingers and hope i wont be late aites!

VICTORIOUS JOURNEY

2005-03-26T21:19:00.000+08:00

hello hello and hello people.
i know you guys missed me. hahakz. My mouse was spoilt and it was super irritating to use the comp thus the un-updated posts. hahakz.

Neways...lotsa things happened after the last entry.
See lar, just now when i was typing had so many2 stories to share with you all. But alas, everything's forgotten now. heh.

Can i just shout and scream i love my sajak members!!!!!
we've finally sailed through the perilous journey which ended today.
Our performance went smoothly, we managed to grab the audiences' attention and our item was not draggy. And, more importantly, nobody forgot their lines. I was told one of the contestants frm RGS forget her line. damn. if i were in her shoes, i would be so paiseh you know. She has some what ruined her sch's rep. heh.

However, sad to say, we didn't clinch the top 3 positions but what made me touched was the thunderous applause our grp received at the end of our item. A big THANK YOU to all CCKS supporters. I love you guys too!We were told that our item received a rather notable amount of applause. hahakz. but, maybe, the other schools had super complicated sajaks and costumes. But, it didn't matter to me. What mattered most was that the whole group screamed as soon as we entered backstage after our item ended. I just can't describe the feeling. It's so undescribable.

Credit must definitely go to the sajak team:
ct sha kusairi
myself
haikal
ruzaini
mario
hafiz y
tikah
fas
syidah
mai
ifah
fazley

and also to cg latifah and fazila for supervising us and allowing us to enter this competition, from which i've made new friends at NUS, bvss, SAS and learn useful things from just this one competition.

Saturday to Wednesday

2005-03-16T17:28:00.000+08:00

Let me tell you briefly what happened during those days. It wasn't the case of lazy-ness as many would have speculated but rather a case of non-stop activities and erm shopping? hahakz....

Saturday:
I was freaking bored at home (there was nobody home) and there's no way i was going to mug and do homework on the FIRST day of my holidays. Had to thank Yaya, my bore-dom saviour who asked me out to town so there went my saturday. Reached home around 2100++ hahakz...still early but had to go home early....had a crazy time there man....bought few stuff....

Sunday:
Balik kampong!!!! i didn't know i was going back to m'sia till i reached home frm town saturday night. So sunday was gone completely. Reached home quite late lah. couldn't remember what time and was too damn tired to even do homework!

Monday:
woke up and went out to NUS Kent Ridge Communal Hall for dance prac. learnt salsa, damn was it fun. i have a good dancing partner - harris.....hahakz...see ya more often ya hairy-ass! hahakz...ended at noon.
then after lunch, ard 1400, me, hiddy and adibah went to bugis....shop shop shop. adibah baru tahu my taste and she said..." you are so into urban and bende2 kedayak-kan" muahahahaha....and hiddy learnt of a new place to shop - the shopping arcade.
Nasib baik lah aku yang bawak kau jalan2 pat sane! hahakz....
Then i quickly rushed home. Changed my shirt and pants and went to sch for syf rehearsal all the way till 2100. Once i reached home, by 2200, i was already damn tired so hit the lights off. I didn't watch DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES!!!!

Tuesday:
Woke up in the morning and i went to school.Had remedial. Then, went to Science Centre for a phy excursion. The whole of my class (pure phy mahheehee) and some peeps from 4/6 and 4/7. Tan Liang Hooi and Tan Ling See was very sporting! We sabotaged them!!!! hahakz....
Then after that, around 1600++ went to delia's place for viva arts dance rehearsal. We chose 'tilt ur head back' by c.aguilera and nelly. Went home around 1900++. And finally started doing my phy ws, ss sbq and essay outline and malay karangan outline. And also talked to him. Long time since i talked to him man, missed him so much! hahakz...

And today.....found out viva arts was cancelled this year due to our sch's involvement in the NDP. All of us were like...fuck lah...how can they do that? The reason we wanted to perform is because this is our last year. We wanted something memorable and thought that by gathering our ex-classmates in sec 1&2, we would definitely remember the viva arts night. haiz....
then we went to plaza frm school. i bought a belt!!! then went kranji. then went home.

now i'm rushing to finish this entry. have syf rehearsal at 1900. hahakz..i just went home so that i can eat at home. hahakz....gotta bounce!

Report Card Tomorrow

2005-03-10T21:29:00.000+08:00

I'm damn anxious on getting back my report card.

I want to know my overall score for a maths and e maths. I scraped through both papers!!!! Hooray!!!
I already secured 2 distinctions - physics and malay....i'm hoping one of my maths can be a distinction too...

Anyway, i will definitely be sent out of maths class tomorrow, confirm plus chop hee3...i think i'm so going to flunk my short a maths test on exponentials and ln functions and also trigo differentiation. hahakz...
how can i write d/dx of sec x to be sec x cos x???? it's so completely wrong!!! and philip already asked us to memorise the d/dx of the 6 trigo fxns. after i handed in the test it suddenly hit me that d/dx of sec x is sec x tan x! aiyoooo....

neways, nana didn't come today. and my class had our annual health screening.
kudos to me for maintaining my perfect vision! muahahaha....

i feel like writing something. but something's keeping me. hahakz
i'm nuts. i really am.

chem test tomorrow.
rate of reactions and energy from chemicals.

must always remember breaking bonds is endothermic. forming bonds is exothermic.
Exothermic reaction is due to the larger heat energy given out forming the bonds than the smaller energy taken in to break the bond. therefore, since it's nett is giving out energy, hence it's an exothermic reaction.
the converse is true for endothermic reaction.

And for rate of reactions....there's always 5 factors affecting it :
concentration; temperature; pressure; surface area; catalyts

muahahaha...must still remember how to use the collision theory to explain how each of the following factors affects the reaction rate. hahakz...

what else?

ouh ya...must know how to draw that freaking graph where they compare the different factors against time... hahakz...i must really polish up my chem.

must polish up amaths too, during the hols....finally finish the whole of differentiation but i'm not very comfy with the trigo part and the exponentials. must practise more!

post-party syndrome

2005-03-07T13:53:00.000+08:00

guess what? i did not go to school today!

and i wasn't the only one. Altogether, in 4/9, 5 or 7 people did not come - including my form teacher who's also my amaths and emaths teacher. It was speculated that she ( my F.T.) has finished marking our maths papers and as it turned out, we've did badly. Since she has b.p. (blood pressure, not boiling point ok) she didn't come to school. Oh well, that's what the class thinks only. I don't know if there's any truth to it.

The funny thing is, from what i know, harris and myself have fever. i've not gone to the doc, (going soon) but harris had and his doc suspected dengue!!!. Oh no! If he has dengue, the probability of me having it is semi-high too!!!! oh no!!!! [i'm going insane!!!]...

Well, the lowdown is, i FAILED my combined humans. Thanks to my geog - 5/15 [...i'm crying boo hoo] Can't deny that i'm surprised. I thought i did fine. The 3 pple ard me got 8,9,10 and me? 5!!! how pathetic. They did a 25min test on singapore's development today and the 5 of us who didn't come today obviously have to take it tomorrow. By the way, it's the first time in my 4 years in sec sch that i FAILED a humans paper, other than the first geog class test, the one which twl expected 80% of us to fail.He sooooo boost my confidence in geog now!

k lar i wanna see the doc now! wish me well!

I am the benefactor and endurance worker

2005-03-06T17:57:00.001+08:00

hahakz....that's what harris labelled me.
I had a smashing good time at his place.
Firstly, the six of us went shopping at lot 1 for his bdae present and also for our own shopping! hahakz...bought him a visor.
i got myself new earrings, so did nana and deedee. By the time we reached his place, it was already 4pm. Got news that he'll only start the bbq at 6pm. hahakz...i make a lot of noise at him...keep on telling him that if he had told us earlier, we would have gone to town first then go for his bdae party. hahakz...
then we decided go there with taxi..and he asked us to buy him birthday cake. so we went there. i bought a pair of shoes. shopped at jennyfer..i saw something i badly wanted. my.....must add that to my wishlist already.
then i bbq-ed satay and chicken and was called endurance worker by harris coz i was bbq-ing frm the start to the end hahakz....then they blasted the stereo at his roof-top..(he lives in a terrace) then i felt like i was actually clubbing away hahakz...then yi wen told me that she told the rest i was very photogenic....muahahahaha.....kembang aku....then boon kiat say " yalor can be model liao, got height, got figure, got looks, got smile - megawatt smile" then all of us burst out laughing....hahakz...i just smiled. hahakz.....still can't believe they said that...hee3...
then fasihah bising kat aku pasal him and i was like biase lar die kan giler cam aku!!! ahahkz....but it hurts me, i guess to say that...pple still anggap me as his girl. and my friends still anggap him as my boy.
well, ard 11pm gitu baru me, jane, nana and delia went home.....jeejee and alex went home later....kamen overnight-ed at harris's place...hahakz...
then when i went home my mom scolded me....haiz....back to the old same thing...aiyo! so bingit seh...org balik bukan nak dgr die bising kat me...tol tak?

I am the benefactor and endurance worker

2005-03-06T17:57:00.000+08:00

NEW SKIN ALERT

2005-03-05T12:20:00.000+08:00

yay!!! i've just finished editing my template. just to let you know, i won't be changing my templates frequently. Maybe abt once every three months lar. You want to know why? Hahakz because I think it's a waste of time to change templates so so so frequently hahakz..no offence to those who changed them frequently. Hee3

Neways, feel free to tag me aites. All my regular tag-gers are like M.I.A.
i missed susu, marni, faizal and many2 more!

Oh ya i've got a qns....hahakz
what do you think is the purpose of having a blog?
Is it to pour out your heart's content
or simply to tell others what you did during the day/night/whatever?

Responses please

hAPPY bURFDAE hARRIS!!!

2005-03-05T11:13:00.000+08:00

How can i forget to wish harris happy bdae!!!! i'll be going to his bdae party later then maybe proceed to bugis or far east- time for shopping!!! hahakz....

so Mr Harris Lim Sin Foo,
Happy 16th Birthday!!!
May all your wishes Come true

It's true

2005-02-20T20:20:00.000+08:00

Well, I think it's proven that singaporeans are really tight-lipped about controversial or the -society-won't-really-accept-it kind of topic. Just take the previous post as an example. I was hoping a hot debate would actually pop up at my tagboard but just as I expected, there was scarcely or rather there was no reply at all. No wonder Singaporeans are rated the least type of employee employers are looking out for as they more often than not keep ideas to themselves or just go with the flow; not having a mind of their own.

I didnt quite believe the survey because I thought other people ( like me..hee3) would stand up and save the 'image' of Singaporeans being shy and quiet and all that shit.Because I do know of people who are really outspoken but at least the shit they give is justifiable and of good use. Not the kind of shit that deserve to go down the sewage.

Anyway, so much for my rambling, I was shocked to come across this line which claimed that
"love is nothing".
i was partly horrified partly sympathetic. Maybe the author didn't have much luck in love or maybe he had a rough experience with it. But really, how can anyone say love is nothing? Coincidentally, my module for CME this term is on marriage and parenthood. The basis of these is none other than love or for simplicity's sake, other than other factors such as trust, understanding yadayadayada, isn't it love that binds people together in the first place? Frankly speaking, i can't bring myself to marry a guy whom i don't even love so arranged marriage is a BIG no-no for me!

about this

2005-02-19T17:25:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps....i've got questions for all of you to ponder on...

Qns:
Is sex a 'bond' created between two lovers for them to stay together?

Is sex a signal of lust over love?

Or does it show deep affection for one another?

What do you think???
Feel free to comment on my taggies...

e maths ct today

2005-02-17T19:55:00.000+08:00

hey
studied well yesterday
talked to him about all the things in transformation and locus
then today
e maths ct
it sucked
most of my classmates said they lost 10 marks already
including myself
the paper's out of 40
so we must get everything else right in order to get our distinctions
hope i can make it
erghh......me and arul bet we'll get B3....haiz

well, at least i ended my day on a good note
the sajak team is bonding together
and we're having FUN
cikgu fazilah was shocked to know that i'm also in the syf on top of the two malay department inter-school competitions...hahakz....

well....it's been a week....and so far everything's fine
i just __________ so much......
i can't wait for tomorrow
got sleepover
hahakz

i love you guys!!!!

2005-02-16T19:00:00.001+08:00

just came back from sec 4 & 5 heats.....

here's an update:

4 x 100 purple house team 2 boys - 2nd (my team!!!!)
4 x 100 purple house team 2 girls - 2nd (my team!!!)
100m girls purple house - 1st Norashikin
100m boys purple house - 1st Tan Lun Yi
2nd Khairul
High Jump boys purple house - 3rd Alex!!!!!

my...i don't think i remember anything else....hee3
i was tired from cheering man!!!
hahakz

congrats to ayie for cutting amin heehee( jgn marah min)!!!!

gotta bounce!!!!

awww...you guys missed me huh?

2005-02-12T21:19:00.000+08:00

i wanna wish all those celebrating CNY gong xi fa cai!!!! i had a wonderful CNY with my cousins....hahakz....miss them loads..especially to muhsin hu's at indon...i miss u!!!! so did abg apidz, kak ct and the rest of the crew!!!! come home soon!

Anyways...my cpu broke down! So that's why i couldn't update but here i am now! So save all those tears for me aites...muahahahaha

k..so had track training today. met at 1100hrs ended at 1300hrs. went lot 1 and then went queensway..bought new sports shoes with the hang bao money!!!!! cheap2 one lar..around 50bucks....and its ORANGE!!!!

then carikkan him v day present....haiyo...nasib baik ade connection ngn street guys...leh tlg belikan! hahakz....trime kaceh byk2 yek...owe u guys one man!!!

den now d lowdown. i lost my EZ link card pat queensway!!!!! damn...i had the bus concession in it and a value of 8-dollars-plus.... heart pain lehs.... haiz.....

then on monday v day have remedial until 1730!!!! how to celebrate v day seh...
sob...
sob...
sob...

haiz.....i'm doomed

2005-02-03T20:45:00.000+08:00

confirm i've flunked my amaths test!!!! argh!!! its so damn bloody hard. To make matters worse, i got my surface area and volume formulas of spheres and cones mixed up! so what else can i say? even if my method's right....the whole thing's wrong if my formula is confirmed wrong! hahakz...
Anyways....i've done my part to tell him the truth. I don't wish to comment anymore. i can't blame him if he doesn't want to be my friend. it's all up to him.
However,
i've some good news. you know they always say if you love somebody set them free, if they come back to you then he's yours? well....he's come back to me. i feel so happy. but the sad thing is, though how much we still love each other and want each other, well....something's got in the way, but it's not a third party or what lar.
but you know how it feels when you know he wants you as much as you want him but still, you can't be together? hahakz...the irony of life. He missed me. I missed him too.

thought things over

2005-01-30T13:00:00.000+08:00

dear xxxxxxxxxxxxxx,

there's no use getting to the bottom of this. Our own anger,frustration,distrust have scarred one another. wounds can heal but the scars will remain.

After thinking things through, i just wish to say i'm sorry.

I'm not interested in finding out what really happened. The scars i've inflicted upon you have awakened my guilty-ness; enough to make me just want to apologise to you.

I don't wish to say anything else.

I just wish to say i'm sorry

ouch - you got hit

2005-01-29T23:45:00.000+08:00

you shot yourself on the foot. i can't stand liars. maybe i'm being too judgemental. i don't care. how come it doesn't tally. i thought i could trust you but you prove me wrong. you shot yourself on the foot. sad to say but i've trapped you in your own circle of lies. you can't fool me. you should have picked honesty.

wonderful day ruined by....

2005-01-29T23:21:00.000+08:00

someone. I'm not gonna be mean and diss you on the internet coz my mama taught me better than that...hell, in front of friends, act fierce; say this and that - as if you're such a terror. in front of me, when i tried to shoot you, try to be nice.... coward! why don't you have the guts to tell me what you said to the other people as well. who do you think you're fooling here. i can't take this shit no more.

cckss vs yiss....2-0,cck!!!

2005-01-29T01:19:00.000+08:00

congrats to our school soccer team!!!! they won their home match vs yiss....yeah baby yeah! finally, cck sports can take-off.....
after drama 2day, i went to watch the match with the rest of the girls...kiter dtg jek, we were the most noisy, with me n delia shouting and cheering....the rest of the girls that were watching were just chit chatting amongst themselves, hardly cheered...hee3...we sat somewhere towards the goalpost where the action is,so obviously we were going wild and crazy! hee3...
to angah, jgn lar kau kecik hati tak dpt score 2 kali sak..miss by sikit jek tau...takpe....next week ade match lagik...to my dearest brother...along..congrats for scoring!!!! you scored the first goal!!! and to achik lawa seh the penalty kick....hahakz....rambut pon kiut kau ikat camtu....hahakz....waaah..seme budak2 grago jingo eh yang score....i miss seeing the grago jinggo team play their matches every sunday...hee3...biaselar, when i was with ahem dulu, couple of times i followed them and watch them play....miss abg wadi seh...die dgn lawak dier yang tak abis2...sheesh...and the rest of the gang...fad, am, sakti...ngn their own renditions of lagu2 jiwang and techno...hahakz....those were the days....hee3
oh ya...how can i forget my own cousin - the team captain - khairul!!!! jgn sedih2 eh tak dpt score...next match can still try again...
mcm gerek gitu tgk match bola with my girlfriends...hee3....usually we'll be bored..but there was a difference just now...hee3...don't know how it arises in the first place...then at the end of the match, they were asking when's the next match! hahakz...i think next week friday we'll support the team again.....
ouh ya then when i reached home, while lying on the bed and reading the newspapers, i fell asleep. That was around 8+ when the p10 top 20 countdown started. I did not wake up until 11pm! so now, i can't sleep! and i'm supp to meet the gang at 8.30am 2mr at mc teck whye to have breakfast together before reporting at 9.30 for the newspaper collection e. cip day....then, we'll go bowling...and pool!!!!! so home clothes is a must...i was comtemplating to just use a plain shirt or my tight sleeveless one....then after a while..aiyah..go bowling only what...so use plain tshirt lor....oh my god! i've started using singlish! muahaha.....that's not a good sign. i'll better stop writing now before i sprout any more rubbish!!!!!
hope you people out there have a great day!
love you guys...buaiz2! (",)

i'm in exco, again

2005-01-27T18:08:00.000+08:00

she talked to me this morning. Instinctively, i knew it was with rgds to prefects. I thought my term was already over in the exco but i was wrong. She said i'm still in but under very strict monitoring.
Erm, maybe i should say that last year, i had some hiccups, fall short of expectations and etc. so you get the idea that during my term, i couldn't really prove my ability. Not that i wasn't given the chance but due to lack of experience etc. i cocked up one major event but succeed in the little-little ones. So, she said she thought it would be unfair to remove me from exco as i was in the exco in the first place because i've got the potential.
Hence, the position in exco and the strict monitoring. She told me things which i've heard a couple of times before. It's not that they are repeated things i do but rather points which she repeats but did not realize that i have not done the mentioned things no more. A typical example would be not attending cca....hee3...but since march or june last year, i've started attending and i've 'proven' myself since then thus i'm also in the NP exco - but admin dpt. hahakz....they wanted to put me in welfare then i was like...erghhh...not again! hahakz...
But i am sure there wouldn't be any hiccups this year as i want a good testimonial badly...hahakz...so this is one area where i can have the teachers talk about me. Actually, i have to thank her and charles peng for not removing me from the exco. I've realised that if they did, then i wouldn't be receiving a glowing report due to the shortcomings i had during my term as i left without a good impact. So, i would make the best out of it this time.
Anyway, i've got three tests tomorrow. She postponed the amaths test from today to tomorrow. Then we postponed our physics test frm today to tomorrow because we thought the maths test would be today and you get the idea right. My class bargained with tan ling see to postpone the test on monday but i didn't want to. Furthermore, she said the test would only be a 10-min one so everyone agreed to get it done and over with. Then chemistry was already fixed way back so there's no questions on post-poning it. Thank god i already studied physics yesterday, and a maths too so today i'll focus on chemistry. If i have enough time, then i'll go through maths again then physics..hee3....
Before i forget, i have my newspaper report draft 2 to submit 2mr....drama 2mr too....my, it's been ages since i last attended drama as it always clashes with np and since np is my 1st cca, i have to go for np instead...boo-hoo....i'll be so wild and crazy once i'm with the drama people!!!! hee3....

She's right

2005-01-25T18:05:00.000+08:00

well, believe it or not, my situational piece is a newpaper report on the recent tsunami. That aside, today, i discovered how strong a woman can be. I salute her. She concealed her fears and worries so cleverly that even i did not realise what she was going through, until she told us her story.
She lost an aunt in the tsunami. Though a distant aunt, come on, they're from the same family. Relatives will always stay connected together as one large unit no matter how distant you can be.
Take for example, myself and khairul. We're such distant cousins but end up being very close to one another. Okay. Maybe mine and khairul is a different case because we only found out we're cousins after being friends and i spent all my time in secondary school being in the same class with him. This year, i even sit next to him!
But the thing is, there's this unmistakable and unbreakable bond that people of the same blood share. That's empathy. I could tell her voice was quavering when she told us what happened and was she trying to hold back her tears. I felt for her. I really did. Tears were welling up in my eyes as she poured out her story. For confidentiality's sake, i can't mention who and what actually happened or how she actually lost her aunt. I pity the kids. The one person they see as their wall of support has now crumbled to nothing but debris. But will the boys turn their lives into debris too? No matter how strong they are, the palpable guilt and remorse they felt for maybe not treating their mother better, or how they could have done things better will probably haunt them for the rest of their lives.
It made me realise that just in a snap of the finger, your life could turn 180 deg. and your life can be filled with a standstill, silence, regret, guilt,fear,loss,devastated. You can take days preparing for a journey you're going to take on a holiday. But just how much time are you given to prepare for a journey that will take your life away in an instant just like that? You're given no time at all. You can't even bid a final goodbye.
So while we, the ones who are not affected by this phenomenon continue lives as normal, the other side of the world is crying and grieving. She said, while we are still around, be nice to the people you meet. Be it everyday, just for a second or a minute or an hour. Show them your love and appreaciation. To parents, fellow friends,schoolmates, siblings and whoever else that know you. I know i will. I'll never forget what this lesson taught me.

NUS - My would-be school

2005-01-22T17:10:00.000+08:00

Muahahahaha...i just got back from NUS. I had the Malay mendeklamasikan sajak taklimat from the students there. Met a few guys and girls and they're all very crazy, friendly (and cute) people! hee3...It was an eye opener, really. This lady, Nurlieja-something Mas'at was the mantan NUS student and she took sastera MELAYU and wow..she's amazing! Hahakz...a very talented young lady.
So she gave this workshop on sajak-writing etc. etc. Like i said, it was an eye opener. At first when i knew there was a workshop i was so dreading it but at the end of the day i think it was meaningful and very beneficial.
But, sad thing is, i couldn't make it to nazilah's house to watch the pianist coz the workshop ended later than expected. I feel so bad because i made her change the time and some of them couldn't make it and now, after the time has changed for my sake, i couldn't make it! haiz....
I'm left with a maths hmk....on 2nd application of differentiation - rate of change and studying for chem electrolysis test and geog development indicators test...haiz....and must be prepared for emaths loci & constructions test! eeerrrggghhh!!!
know what, i feel like going swimming 2mr at delia's place...or maybe cck sports centre or at j.e....saper2 nak ikut???

What can i say

2005-01-21T13:05:00.000+08:00

ergh! i so hate the feeling of not being able to accept people.
For this one guy, please understand that i just can't bring myself to get back to you. The last time we were together was two years ago. From last year, after syazwan and i broke up up till now, you are still bothering me, asking for me back. The last time i told you i could not take you back despite your sugar-coated words and promises, you said you understand and won't bug me. But what's happening now is just the reverse.
You know it's so irritating whenever you call me sayang etc. etc. because i don't even feel drawn to you. What's more, you saw another one of your ex and told someone that you want her back too. What the fuck? You can't even make up your mind - whether it's me or her despite us being two completely different people and here you are bugging me, saying that you love me and that you want me back. I thought i still had respect for you as my friend but it has all gone away, blown away with the wind.
In my mind, you're reduced to nothing but a jerk; a desporado;a hypocrite which makes me hate you even more. Now, can you just get lost from my life. I have other problems to deal with than just you being stuck on me. Last words : Find someone else! I don't care if i sound bitchy but i'm just so vexed on him. Close peeps - you should know who......
ade ke hari raya haji aku ckp macam gini? hahakz...Anyways, to all the Muslims, Selamat Hari Raya Haji!

getting the hang of it

2005-01-18T23:03:00.000+08:00

so kiddos...i've somewhat adjusted to the pace of the pretty much acclaimed - 'sec 4 life' but basically it is not much of a diff as compared to last year, perhaps more pressure this year! hahakz...I'm proud to declare that i'm the creator of 4/9's taggyline erm i mean class tagline - 'it's not failure that weighs you down but it's the way you carry it' sounds familiar? muahahaha.... previously it was ' 1% aspiration, 99% perspiration and 100% distinction' hahakz...then my form teacher was like...99% perspiration, won't all of you die of dehydration? hahakz so she decided to change it and my idea was picked by the majority of the class...ceyyy...like....BIG DEAL!!! hahakz...Anyways, i failed my a maths differentiation test #2 while khairul scored! dah terbalik lak...and for differentiation test #3, both of us won't get full marks already...arghh!!!!! it's ok...i won't give up...hahakz...just for those of you who have yet to know, i'm a very determined person hahakz....neways...dunt be mad k if i'm not updating regularly....time-constraints lar my little papadums...hee3...gotta bounce chai chien!

love me when i'm gone

2005-01-16T10:26:00.001+08:00

heya...wow...quite some time since i last blogged but i need you all to continue loving me and reading this when i'm gone kiez..hahakz...yes...i admit i love that song by three doors down hahakz...anyways, i'm preoccupied you see but you must still visit my bloggy kiez. and if i didn't link up any of you, tag me aites!
Anyways, went bowling yesterday, with haaziq, azhar,nisah and syahfiq to celebrate azhar's bdae which was actually on the twelveth..dah besar adik kakak sorang nie! taking his PSLE this year. Wish him all the best; jgn tgk cartoon jek! hahakz...
Hey, you guys know what? i wish to congratulate myself for having succeeded in revising the whole of thermal physics and doing the tys questions. But i'm going to attack tan ling see and ask her some questionsto clear my doubts...hahakz...so i'm left with revising general physics. Maybe i'll start next week. See how lar. But today, i'm going to start revising chemistry, electrolysis, to be exact. There's a test on that this thursday and shit! i must buy the chem wbk by today as there's chem 2mr!!!! And also get my ss tbk from kak huda...hee3...hope i can go out and meet someone today. Miss him so much. There's something that's burning in my mind. I can't get it out but i think i already know the answer. I feel so bad already just thinking about it.

testS!!!

2005-01-11T18:43:00.000+08:00

just when i thought the test is on friday, out of the blue she wants it 2mr!!! gosh...and with her maths txtbk hmk due 2mr, tys hmk due thursday, ss sbq test on thursday, chem ws and workbook due friday....my....i have all these hmk and its not even the end of the week yet! Anyways, the new prefect master came in...well...kinda gave a pep talk...at least there'll be someone who is strict when i leave the board! muahahahahaha...my batch only have to suffer with him for about half a year before we step down but to our dearest juniors, aww...i pity you guys. I can predict that things are different and will be different since he has his own visions, that ties-in with prema's 'vision'...well..at least they work together well...just hope they won't scold the prefects together as well! neways..gtg...need to study! buaiz...(wish me luck k) thank you, thank you, u're far too kind....sounds familiar? hahakz...k k i'm outta here!!!!

running away

2005-01-09T22:24:00.000+08:00

First and foremost, happy suwit 16th bdae to nadia yeay....May all your wishes and dreams come true!

Wow. Now i really do not know where to start. Just when i thought i would spend my Sunday revising for 6 hours and mising my hindustan movie, the unexpected happen. Well, i don't wish to tell you my story as i chose not to dwell on the matter anymore. They say 'forgive & forget' and that's what my mom and i did.
One thing I can't change is the fact that i did run away from home. Well, i'm sure some of you would have your mouth gaping open by now. what? farzaana the top class student, np exco member, prefects exco member - the girl who's always all smiles ran away??? yes guys, what you're reading is true. I did run away. But i've reached home and i'm everything's sort of fine right now.

Credit must go to sha for letting me stay at her place.....jeejee for taking the trouble to rent vcds and come down to sha's place and to my baby who's there for me. Not forgetting lala aka nana too. I love you guys! I know my friends and my guy will always be there for me; no matter what sorta shit i'm going through. Thus proven, a friend in need is a friend indeed!

no retest for me!!!!

2005-01-07T21:27:00.000+08:00

yeay..i'm freaking happy today...firstly, i scored my a maths test..hee3...at least i began the year with a good start. hahakz...missed lessons because of orientation but i did my part to catch up with lessons so i don't lose out much. When philip was reading out the names of pple who failed or just pass, i was scared that i would fall into either category. i was sitting on my chair, keep on hoping that she would flip to the last paper very quickly and not read out my name. boy, was i relieved when she finished flipping through. the paper was on 14 and those people who scored below 11 marks had to take a retest on monday; a much harder paper, phew...i got 11. neways to the person sitting beside me in class, if you're reading this, don't feel too sad k..it's only the beginning of the year..i may score this paper but it's only one of the many tests she will give. so, don't feel too bad aite..i'm sure you can do the retest.Just don't be careless!!! Then next, the muster parade went well. The np cadets were given a chance to go to the reception...g.o.h. first of course! hahakz...i don't kbnow how much i ate but i knew i took every single kuih that was there! hahakz...it's not because i'm a glutton but rather because i'm tasting everything! wakakakakaka....of course i had the food shared among deliar and godzilla! hee3...well, for the weekend, i have a maths hmk, which i had completed (hooray!), english compo and not forgetting my holz hmk for malay which i have yet to do - a composition!!!! waaawaaawaaa...k lar...gotta bounce! have a wonderfoooool weekend!

G.O.H. here i come!!!!

2005-01-06T21:40:00.000+08:00

muahahahahahahahahaha....finally, after 3 years in NPCC, i get to be IN the contingent! hahakz...whenever i'm in the g.o.h. my oc unit will go, farzaana, i need you for the emcee....heart pain ar...esp national day parade and awards day last year! hahakz...then this time, i told her, cher cannot lar...everytime i want to be in the contingent u ask me to be the emcee...i get someone else lar...then luckily she agreed! hahakz...so yesterday and today reached home ard 7plus..then ard 8 haf to start hmk oredi...sian lehz...hahakz....but today i wasn't happy lar...supp to be the left marker..then sudd this one guy pop up and just because he was taller than me( slightly only..sob sob) he get to be the left amrker then i haf to be beside the right marker...waah..v boring lehs...i prefer be left amrkercoz my side got ahmad and wei hong, keat sions...then we always talk cock hee3....if possible, don't want that guy come lehs 2mr...so the sebok you know...neways...today had a maths test on differentiation. It went a-ok except for the last qns where i cocked up..shud haf subsituted the value of x!!!! haiyo!!! but i hope i can still get marks...hee3...and luckily, today i can be in class the whole day as the psl programme ended yesterday...woohoo....oryty then, i gotta bounce....don't feel shy to tag my board aites! doodles....

draggy, tirey daye...

2005-01-04T18:03:00.000+08:00

hahakz....hello people! i've had a very tiring day today, and i really meant tiring! neways, all of this tired-ness of the psl programme will end 2mr!!! wakakakakak...err, maybe actually friday? after the muster parade. The first lesson i had was english and man...i'm so blessed to be in Band 1 in prema's class....oh no! the 4/5 and 4/8 peeps have yet to see the other side of her. Her lesson today was a-ok...she was all smiles and all that friendly, mainly telling us the overview of the year. Up next was chem...rico chow was fun! She is the most animated teacher....hahakz...very cartoonish and yeah..she has a different mindset..same like me...i was shocked when she said what she said coz i thought i was the only one who wasn't thinking along the lines of a so-called educated person..hahakz....i had fun...hope i'll be able to pull up my chem grades though...As for a maths, mrs philip had started on differentiation and damn, the prefects had to leave for the orientation programme after she just went through the first example. And tomorrow, we'll be having 2 hrs of a maths before recess and yup, we'll have to leave early again! Luckily all this madnes will come to an end tomorrow and i don't think i'll favour asking for early leave from lesson to eat as we have duties during recess. I'll rather not miss my lessons! hahakz....neways, huda and jannah came to school today; they were bored at home....i chatted with them hahakz...slack a while at the canteen...we had a good laugh man, talking abt ahem-ahem....hahakz...and on the way home today i met him....miss him so much.....hee3...allright..i better stop before i get more mushy and stuff....neways..i must remember to bring 31 bucks 2mr to pay for 2 nco tshirts!!! hee3..remind me aites! thx guys! take care!!!

whaddaya think????

2005-01-02T19:20:00.000+08:00

phew....finally a new skin fer the eyes...hahakz...i mixed contents and pix of skins and come up with this!!! waddaya think?? like the prologue in the beginning? style uh...hahakz....neways, i managed to cut out abt 100+ newspaper cuttings for oral conversation file.But sadly, i lost my oral practice file. So this means i've to photocopy its contents from someone else tomorrow. I'm like looking forward to school. It is strange. I was dreading school this whole week and suddenly it was like, oh yeah! school's tomorrow! hahakz...what rubbish! But what i am SO not looking forward to is the diagnostic tests and the prefects' meetings; especially, the beginning of the year where there're lots of 'feedback' regarding psl programme. Hey, i'll be changing my prologue maybe fortnightly..or maybe monthly? what's your choice??? tag me aites!

tata titi tutu kiter chaoz dulu

2005-01-01T18:33:00.000+08:00

so what did i do on the year's first new day? you wouldn't believe it! Ispent the whole day filing worksheets that were supposed to be filed in looong time ago!!! hahakz....i said the whole day coz i woke up at 1300..can you believe it? i think it was because i didn't want to get up when the rain was still pouring and oh, it was so cozy man!!! Hahakz...and after that, i spent the rest of the time doing admin stuff. I've re-arranged practically everything by topics and left one section for practice papers...i did ss, geog, chem, physics, e maths.....still left with a maths to be sorted out. I don't think i'll be doing malay and english coz eng...must sort into 5 diff ring files ( mdm prema's madness) and for malay, i took out all the w/s and left the ring file at the cabinet in school!!! wakakakakka...well, i need a new file for e maths, chemistry and a maths! i can't even place the fasteners in place for all these files!!

welcum welcum

2004-12-31T22:03:00.000+08:00

LET'S USHER IN the new year with my new blog(name)!!! woo-hoo...hahakz...i fooled you people huh! Everybody was expecting me to change template etc. etc. but the truth is i'll still stick to this one for the time being. Hahakz...for no other reason than convenience of course! Well, actually, i was experimenting with diff skins and putting a little 'urban' touch to it. But i have all of this crazy ideas in my mind that i do not know which one i should pursue. Hahakz....

well, u must be wondering by the change of name after like almost 1 year of using it. Well, it's because i've been using it the whole year round in 2004, that's why i wanted a change. Anyway, it sort of compliments my taste for vintage clothes and urban/tribal accessories! But just because my fashion taste is urban-nish, don't expect me to change my layout to nothing else but URBAN things k!!! And i'll stick to r&b. hip-hop.techno. but i've yet to hear more from urban/chill out music! So thats why it was urbanzaanista. Zaa is part of my name and the rest is just 'creativity' heehee3..string them together and u'll get urbanzaanista which is none other than me!!!